Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A New Excuse

So, if anyone out there is looking for a new excuse for being late to work, I have one for you:

First, you must go on a trip. You needn't be gone long, but you must go far, far away. And the distance must be east/west, not north/south. Also, you must take a battery-run alarm clock with you and use it at least once.

Then, when you return from your trip, you must pull your alarm clock out of your bag and set your alarm clock to get up for work the next morning. Never mind what the time hands say. Just focus on the alarm hand.

Then in the morning, wake up to your alarm clock, and listlessly walk around the house getting ready for work until you look at your living room clock and wonder why is it WRONG!?!

Wait! Oh, crap! You're THREE HOURS LATE for work!


Note: for this excuse to work, you must do the math carefully to calculate the time difference correctly. Otherwise, no one will believe you. Also, you'll risk being perceived as totally air-headed by your co-workers. But it might be worth three extra hours of sleep. Just so long as you're not so dumb as to be incapable of doing your job.


Marianne Elixir said...

It is a shame this wouldn't work on a semi-regular basis.

I need help finding excuses to be late to my stay-at-home-mom career, in case any brilliant ideas come to you with all that extra sleep.

teal! said...

ooooh, three extra hours of sleep sounds absolutely lovely....

Sarah said...

Last year weren't you late back from Christmas break because your delayed plane was literally arriving as you were supposed to be getting to work that morning? Only then you didn't have the nice extra 3 hours of sleep. This is much better.